I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
There's an old guy having a conversation with his penis in the bathroom right now.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
You have no idea how awkward it is fucking someone with the same name as your dog
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
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