Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
