I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize
