...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
Randomize
