Do you think if I drink bleach they will let me leave work?
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
she's a nursing student, i didn't think vomit would freak her out so much
you puked ON HER
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
Randomize
