You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
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