Nicole vs. Life
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
