Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
Mystery solved: The table is broken because I had sex on it last night.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
Do I need to call and sing lullabies? Because that's creepy, but I'm a really good friend.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
