So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'm sitting in Starbucks, waiting for direction in my life, or it to be 8 p.m. Whatever comes first.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
He looks like a Mormon from a lifetime movie. Oddly I wanna give him a hand job
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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