i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
Randomize
