it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Randomize
