one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Randomize
