My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
