O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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