You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
There was a time I was reining queen of Sunday funday... And at that same time I also weighed 20 pounds more, had the morale of a spearmint rhino stripper, and woke up most mornings asking more questions than fucking Barbara Walters. I think I just wrote my own epitaph.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
Randomize
