You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
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