The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
He FaceTimed me fucking his new girlfriend. He was wearing a banana costume.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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