Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Dude if her licking my face hammered isn't love I don't really want to know what love is.
Thats Poetry
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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