She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
YOU ARE THE ONLY PERSON I KNOW THAT STEALTH CLEANS PEOPLE TOILETS
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
Randomize
