I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
