...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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