Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
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