I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
Just stepped off the plane in St. Louis. I'm breaking out in hives, I'm allergic to Midwesterners. Can't WAIT to get the fuck out of here.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Oh dear. If we're both hearing alien sounds then perhaps they're real.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
Randomize
