Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
I've heard semen is good for your skin though, so that pimple on my chin should clear right up.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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