My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
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