3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
At least make sure they are 18
Why
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Randomize
