he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
