sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
Randomize
