I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
