Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
