Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
Randomize
