you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize
