I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
