She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
why do cheetos always look like penises
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
What better than a girl who loves jager, sexts like a champ and is down for t-bell at any hours of the night? oh wait, NOTHING.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
