he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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