Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
