My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
we can add 'stealing hydrangeas from the sign in front of the credit union because we're too poor to have all of the flower arrangements professionally done' to my list of maybe-felonies
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
