there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I will expect an hourly check text to confirm you are alive and that you aren't dead in a ditch somewhere with a hobo dry humping your corpse
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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