apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
Like if Robert Downey Jr. and Kiefer Sutherland got together for a bender, that's how drunk I want us to be.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize
