Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
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