So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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