Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I’M DRUNK AND EXCITED.
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
Randomize
