weddingsv make me drug and hornr
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Randomize
