White coat. Heels.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
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