rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
I just got a handjob in the back of an Uber while a large German dude and a Midwestern fuck-boi sang along in falsetto to the Bohemian Rhapsody.
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