Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Really need a jack off emoji
Who do we write to about that?
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
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