My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I woke up in solitary confinement, wheb they moved me the guy that sold me the pill of Molly at the concert was in the police waiting room, we nodded to each other.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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