Why are handjobs necessary in class?
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Randomize
