He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Randomize
