This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
